When's a Good Time to Talk About Death?

While alive? Or, when you’re dead, and others have to take matters into their own instead of honoring your wishes?

I don’t think that talking about death attracts it; it’s not something you have to call it just arrives. It seems to me that it is an inescapable subject which, at some point, must be given the time of day.

A few days ago my dear mother, whom I call the voice of my conscience, sent me a letter certified by her doctor where she established her last wishes. This comes from a conversation we had, and that she had with her doctor, about the things that she would like to have done in THE inevitable moment, thus fulfilling her last will. It’s not the same thing to have THE conversation as to read a piece of paper with all the I’s dotted and the T's crossed. I was very excited to receive her letter because we still sent letters by snail mail, but when I opened it and saw what it was I said: "Oh, I'm not ready for this". And I still haven’t been able to read it. I ran out of wine so I’ll read it when I buy some more.

To eternity and beyond! Photo by Andre Benz.

But it seemed right that with the maturity, the wisdom and the awareness that everyone, God willing, will grow old, we can have a say in what we’d like once our body leaves us. And the family left behind can have a plan of action instead of having to improvise at the time of grief.

Equally important is to have a will; even if we think that we don’t have anything to our name (aside from debt!), that everything will go to the family or the children, if there are any, etc. The ideal scenario is to have something written that you can eventually "upgrade” or if necessary, "downgrade." All in all, it’s better to have something "Signed, Sealed, Delivered."

For moi, I would rather not have help from any machine, be ventilated or anything similar. If I fall flat on my back, don’t try to prolong my agony or that of the family. I would like to donate everything that’s of use: my organs and if it’s possible my curly, and bigger than life hair. I would also ask to be cremated and throw my ashes into the sea. And if I may, (because I’m still alive so bear with me) the day I leave to begin a new life far away (where I’ll be waiting for all of you😜) I’d like for the people to have a party. Celebrate that I lived a full life, I danced my heart out, loved intensely and that as far as I could, I was the best or the worst, but never mediocre.

My dreamed sunset beach party. Photo by quanghieu_st1.

So there you have it. If I have time I’ll certify this information but I’ve heard that if it’s on social media is legit so here you have it.

P.S.
In my postmortem party I would like you to read My Fantasy Award-Winning Speech, but please change the ending because I don’t want Bombón to be scared, and believe I’ll be looking for him later that night😉

Side dish: “Volar” by Alvaro Soler.